Sunday, April 10, 2011

Finished...

And "finished" is about all I can say for my half marathon today. I didn't beat my old time, heck, I didn't even match my old time...I was 12 minutes slower. Here are just a few of the things I blame on my poor performance today (and by poor I simply mean that it sucked and I did not meet my own expectations for myself)
  • It was hot
  • I started off too fast
  • There were a lot of long hills
  • There were A LOT of people
  • I crapped out too early
  • I lost my head and fell apart mentally
  • I did not properly fuel myself
  • I did not properly train...apparently!
I've prided myself on being able to finish races without having to stop and walk. Well, that didn't happen today. Between mile 2 and 3 I had one of those "UH-OH" moments. You know, when you realize things are not good. Then I had to give up and walk around mile 5. To make matters worse I was so upset with myself for having to stop that I actually started to get upset (yes, cry) and started to hyperventilate...that is really hard to manage when you're already exhausted and hot. I walked a bit and then started to run again, only realize I was not ready to start running again yet and had to walk some more.

I thought I had that out of my system, all while realizing that I still had A LOT of mileage ahead of me. Then came the hills! These were long, everlasting hills. I said "to hell with it" and started walking again. By this time I had no idea what was going on or how I would even finish the race. I was thrown completely off my game. I walked for quite a while...then noticed that other runners where being carried off the road on stretchers. This made me realize that I wasn't the only one sucking today. I decided I would just walk all I wanted and if Craiger caught me we'd just finish together...I was hoping this would happen. When things get tough it is always nice to see a familiar face, especially when it is the one you love! Craiger was nowhere to be found though so I just kept pushing on and hoping he hadn't been carted off on a stretcher.

Yep, that was pretty much the entire race. There was no turning point when things got better...it all sucked equally. I was tired, exhausted, hot and my whole body hurt. I was just glad that eventually, somehow I would cross the finish line and be able to sit down. I really can't say there was one nice/good part of today's race. I read on a running t-shirt "Embrace the Suck." It means to push through the suckiness because every run has a sucky part, and know that it will get better. I tried so hard today to "Embrace the Suck" but all I could do was think about how much it sucked and was not getting better. Today's race really made me reconsider half marathons...and of course my wild idea of completing a full marathon this year. Now that I've had some time to re-cooperate I have to say that I'm intrigued to run another half and see if I can make it better than this one...if for some reason it is just as bad or worse I'm positive I'll be hanging up the sneakers.

By the way, my first half marathon time was 2:08. My goal for today was 2:00 or under. My time for today was 2:20.

Here's what I'm thankful for:
  • I finished
  • I was not carried off on a stretcher
  • I was not given IV fluids while crashing in the grass
  • I did not BONK and was able to run myself across the finish line without assistance
  • I did not puke in a bag in the crowd of runners in the finishing areas for all to see
  • My hubby was just as fortunate as me with all of the above

2 comments:

jan said...

Your Grandma and Grandad are so proud of you both! First people we have known personally who dared to enter - and finish! Yeah!!

Aparrish said...

Seriously, way to suck it up ;) Are you kidding-you can't suck for trying. Some of us are too scared to even take the first step let alone finish a 13mile run. And the Amanda i know doesn't get scared or bullyed out of doing something-just lace up and try again or i'll call you a wuss :)